Victory: Sharing HAES and FA

There hasn't been too terribly much HAES/FA/fat-related stuff in my life lately. But I did have a really cool conversation with a colleague after work last night. Basically I talked all about intuitive eating and HAES and whatnot and she was all interested and into it. I like her, and I hate hearing her feeling bad about herself or think she needs to diet/buy into Kaiser's "Weight Management" (where they try to sell her on it being not a diet, but it is)/etc because people (family, docs, etc.) tell her she needs to diet and lose weight.

She is open to looking at books and resources. As soon as I find which box they're in, I'll bring her some!

Not a four-letter word

Check out this FLABULOUS advice column! Miss Conduct is my new fave mainstream-media fat-poz ally.

So basically, a man writes in because he got slapped for commenting on a woman's “nice, full, hourglass figure” on first meeting her, while planning a first date.

Miss C responds that a) it's not OK to hit, unless in self-defense, b) it's not a good idea to comment on a woman's figure unless you're very close, and c) - and here's the really great part:

Finally, your story is a sad comment on the extent to which fat prejudice has permeated our society -- that the suggestion that a woman is heavy can actually be considered an assault to honor, “fighting words” along the lines of a racial slur. If we lived in a world that celebrated all body types, in which desirability and health were not thought to be inexorably tied to one’s BMI, the idea of a woman slapping someone who suggested that she was plump, zaftig, even fat (not a four-letter word, you’ll note) would make about as much sense as slapping someone who pointed out how red her hair was. (To learn more about size acceptance, check out the National Association to Advance Fat Acceptance, Health at Every Size, and the writing of Paul Campos and Kate Harding, among others.)

Seriously. In the Boston Globe, she says this. I think I'm in love!!

Full story: http://www.boston.com/bostonglobe/magazine/articles/2010/03/14/figures_of_speech/

Eating with people

I had a fun fat-poz eating experience yesterday. There's this coworker, SM, with whom I'm becoming friends. I'm really enjoying it. She's a sweetheart and I enjoy her - and she's one of the few people at my job who are relatively my own age. We haven't hung out outside of work yet, due mostly to the fact that she lives over an hour away and commutes here, and the fact that I've been moving and insanely busy. But we have lunch together sometimes.

Yesterday, I asked if she'd go and get us lunch because I had gotten it last time and I was really busy yesterday. She was willing, so we started trying to figure out what we wanted. I thought I might want a salad, but decided on a burger. Meanwhile, I had talked her into a salad for her! So she gets back with my "junk food" lunch of burger with all the fixin's and fried zucchini, while she's having a "virtuous" salad. (Yup, my good food/bad food stuff got triggered...) I said, truthfully, that the salad looked good but kind of small. That gave her permission to say that she'd considered getting a burger on the side, and she should have because this wasn't enough food.

So nice to hear someone else think like that, too. With women you're just getting to know, you're always wondering if they've got diet-brain, if she might be thinking this was enough food or secretly thinking I was a stereotype-fat-girl eating burgers and fries all the time, or whatever. But she was just like, "I'm gonna be hungry by 3 o'clock!" So nice to feel comfortable with her... this speaks well for my ability to be close friends with her. Yay!

Link of the day

I highly recommend this AWESOME, empowering article by Paul Campos and Marilyn Wann (What a pairing; FA royalty if anyone is!)

Below is an excerpt of my favorite few paragraphs; read the rest at the link that follows.

Fatties, it's time to fight back: If you're judged obese, you're a second-class citizen at best

BY Paul Campos AND Marilyn Wann

... We recognize that the stakes are high. Fatter people are less likely to be hired, are paid less, are less welcome as college applicants, are denied medical treatments, are likely to be charged double when we fly on airplanes, are unwelcome as customers seeking to buy clothes and are discriminated against constantly in countless ways. If you're judged fat, you're a second-class citizen at best, untouchable - even less than human.

That's wrong. Very wrong.

So, it's time to fight the good fight against clueless bullies. If you can't be at home in your own body, where exactly are you supposed to go? Sure, eat right and exercise. That's what both of us do. It's good for us, and it feels good. But guess what - one of us is still thin and the other is still fat.

And that's only natural. The idea that Kevin Smith would be as waif-like as Keira Knightley if they both had the same lifestyle is nonsense. But it's the kind of nonsense that our government feeds us every day, when it claims that, according to a bunch of definitions it made up out of thin air, everyone can and should be a certain size.

So be a rebel. Draw a line that's guaranteed to do you (and people of all sizes) some good. Draw a line against weight bullying. And defend it. Eat what you want and where you want. And fly only the airlines that treat you properly.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/opinions/2010/03/08/2010-03-08_fatties_its_time_to_fight_back.html#ixzz0hbd4zxFf