Sunday, December 2, 2012

Deleted Comment

I'm flattered, I think... I have enough readers that I'm now deleting my second unacceptable comment. The first was a concern troll... this one's just downright rude.

I received the following comment on my most recent post:
Anonymous December 2, 2012 12:23 PDM
Why are you taking rest days? You should be doing SOMETHING extra every day, no excuses.

If you always say you're "too tired"/"wanted a rest day" then you're not going to get anywhere.

I will be deleting the SH*T out of this comment. Do I even need to list the reasons why? The use of "should," the scolding/reprimanding tone, the phrase "you're not going to get anywhere." Um... the exercise professionals I trust have told me to start with 3 days a week. Not to mention that telling someone who's taking first tentative steps into a new and difficult lifestyle change that they're DOING IT WRONG OOGA-BOOGA is pretty much guaranteed to be unhelpful/counterproductive.

Jerk.

31 comments:

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    5. her blog... her rules.... who are you to tell her how sensitive to be? I find how this blogger is talking about getting more movement and exercise from the start point she finds herself at to be inspirational and brave.... it is fine to express your opinion. it is not okay to tell her what to do or how to think.

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    6. Thanks Ivan. I really appreciate the supportive comments!

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  2. Good for you not letting it bug you, Amanda. I used to fall so so so easily into the trap of Every Day, and it's still something I struggle with - well, if I'm supposed to exercise every single day of my entire life, and I forget or I'm legitimately too busy or twisted my ankle or for any other reason miss one single day, I may as well give the whole thing up.

    This attitude is not helpful. People can work up to working out daily, if it's healthy and helpful for them. BUt especially in the beginning, you've GOT to be able to forgive yourself if you're going to get anywhere without giving up.

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    1. Thanks Samantha. Obviously I need to learn not to feed the trolls... just makes 'em get nasty.

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  3. But I'm a commenter! On the Internet! I clearly know your own life, skills, needs, and goals better than you do yourself -- and way better than any actual experts whom you consult!

    [Note: I'm going for sympathetic sarcasm from a like-minded person who's deleted her fair share of such comments. I understand that as a new and unknown commenter, that's something of a risk. If I failed in my attempt at humor, I sincerely apologize.]

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    1. No explanation needed. You come through loud and clear and I appreciate the support and the chuckle!

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  5. Wow, Amanda, this seems to be a whole lot more about the commenter than it is about you.

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  6. Wow, what a gigantic dickweed. Can I say "dickweed" on your blog? (It would be really funny for ME to get banned and for DW to get to keep posting.)

    So, DW, I gotta know. Are you *just* a pathetic judgmental dickweed who doesn't have anything else to do on Sunday other than insult people who are trying, very bravely and in public, to make some changes in their life? Or are you someone who actually knows the writer and is hiding behind online anonymity to say the shitty judgmental things that you KNOW are hurtful and wrong or they'd be OK to say in real life?

    Either way, you're a phenomenal asshole, but I'm curious about exactly *which* kind of asshole you are.

    Amanda, I apologize for responding to this, since it just keeps the thread alive and gives DW the negative attention s/he so pathetically craves. In the future, you should just delete this nonsense and move along. In fact, you should probably delete THIS.

    And, read http://inoveryourhead.net/haters-gonna-hate/.

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    2. No, she can delete this one because you - a random dude, sitting at home on your computer - have no right to make comments on how she "should" live her life. Do you know how she SHOULD live her life? However the fuck she wants to. And if that is not in keeping with how YOU think she should, well....that's sad for you, but not really something that she needs to be concerned with. I am a PhD, and I am sick to DEATH of seeing people settle for intellectual mediocrity, but somehow that hasn't motivated you to educate yourself beyond what you see on your local scare news. Luckily, however, I am smart enough not to sit around being sad because someone doesn't want to live their life the way I think they "should." You might want to find something more constructive to do with your time than sit around harassing bloggers about their personal choices, and if you are going to comment on people's health efforts then you might want to start reading some critical literature that discusses health. Of course, you are intellectually mediocre, so I won't hold my breath. Cheers!

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    4. Fat Grad, thanks - you rock. :)

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    5. So do you, Amanda! Good luck on your exercise journey! By the way, have you considered water aerobics? It's super fun and the water supports your whole body, so it doesn't tend to be painful the way other exercises can be. It's my personal favorite exercise, and it was what I used when I was changing my relationship to exercise. Just a thought. :)

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    6. Fat Grad - I LOVE water aerobics but unfortunately the overhead (figure out schedule/schedule my life to fit in a - likely inconvenient - class; make sure I have had food recently enough but not too recently; drive to gym/pool; change & shower; try to find space in class that's deep enough but not too deep, but also not too crowded; try not to feel embarrassed when I go slower than the instructor says, or skip an exercise or group of exercises; change & shower again) is just way too much of a barrier. I have spent months and months as a member of the Y and only gone two times. So I gave myself permission to cancel the Y membership and buy a secondhand elliptical.

      Maybe someday when I've built my confidence and tolerance up... I do absolutely love the water!

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    1. Wow...Amanda's amazingly patient not to have blocked you by now. Her blog, her rules. Her body, her call.

      But more to the point, what are you doing bitching at her when you *SHOULD* be exercising right now? Don't make the lazy whiny excuse that you already exercised today, or that it's more important for you to be telling her what she needs to do. If you have time to make anonymous blog comments, you're not exercising enough. Go on, right now. A random stranger on the internet (who obviously knows what you need better than you do, just like you know exactly what Amanda should be doing) demands it.

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    2. Kelly - Thanks for your words!!

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  9. You're such a moron, Anon. You have to take rest days with exercise because the muscles need time to heal and grow, even if you're very fit. I can't believe how ridiculous you are. You are hateful, pathetic, spiteful, but on top of that, WRONG!

    And no-one ever needs any reason to delete any comment on their blog! You do not have free speech on other people's platforms!

    Amanda, keep deleting what they say, they are a fool. Who on earth do they think they are? And they say you think you're a god... you have a right to publish only what you want to publish on your own blog, they have no right to tell you what to do!

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    1. Thanks Ruth! All the positive energy and support are so amazing. I am so grateful for the support of friends and strangers alike. :)

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  10. DW's comment sounds a lot like my inner-critic. This is the kind of yelling I do at myself. I have a lot of compassion for others but usually not myself. Seeing this in writing has helped me to fight back against my inner critic. Take that DW!

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    1. Jenny - yay! Now THAT's finding a silver lining! :)

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  11. Amanda, Don't let the boogie men get you off track. For every single plan in the world there are a hundred people ready to tell you that their plan is better.

    As I constantly tell my students, "You live in your body. Nobody knows how it feels or what is going on in there better than you. Do what feels right for you today, so you can come back next week or the week after."

    I can tell you based on my decades of teaching that nothing derails a fitness program quite like getting an injury. So the most important thing is that you exercise safely so you can exercise again another day. And by the way, since you are living in your body and you are doing this experiment to see what works for you, that means you have permission, no actually a responsibility, to make changes as you go along. The things you decide up front, may not work for you going forward, so never let a too-rigid plan get in the way of actual progress.

    Oh, and GO YOU!

    oxoxox
    Jeanette

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    1. Jeanette, thank you thank you. I need these voices so much. I'm not sure the mainstream conversations around fitness are doing anyone, of any size, any good... and certainly not those of us trying to do "intuitive movement" (a la intuitive eating). Thanks for being a voice of reason amidst the cacophony.

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